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Betrayal of the Beloved

Friday December 3 2004 09:08 IST

By Karmayogi

Personal Agenda is a phrase of the present time. Vested interests, wheels within wheels, axe to grind are earlier versions of the same idea. Language changes for the better, becomes picturesque, captivating, but MAN remains the same in essentials. Friendship was valued as a cherished possession. The selfish human nature sets limits to it. A Frenchman had a very beautiful wife. He was intimate with a friend of his and wanted him to visit often. The friend was unwilling to oblige. On being pressed, the friend said, I am sorry. Your wife is too beautiful. I better stay away. This is magnificent friendship that struggles against human weakness. The friends candour is admirable, though embarrassing. Betrayal at times of crisis is as common as the intimacies of friendship.

A lady marries for love having experienced that evanescent emotion that elevates one to rarefied heights. After a time, she discovers that it was love on her part and ordinary marriage on the part of the husband. The disenchantment grows into disillusion when she hears out of his mouth that his motive was her dowry. Sometimes she also finds out he was not faithful to her or to her emotion for him. She discovers the truth in the saying that the rosy path leads to a nasty end. Most take the realities of life in the stride of age. Some take it to heart and only that becomes a reality of life for the rest of her life. It is true Sri Aurobindo has a solution, even for this eternal curse of a yearning heart. He says the betrayal is not in the other person, but in us. Contradictions are complements, obstacles are opportunities. This is old wisdom that reveals its forceful truth after a time. But, how can a man condone infidelity in a beloved? Does Sri Aurobindo offer any feasible solution that a loving heart can accept without rankling?

Mother says She does not give us the occasion to lie when we decide not to lie. Its abundant truth is the abiding experience of all who turn away from falsehood. She not only exhorts us to be true, but practically supports us in our endeavour by changing the very atmosphere. Here in the occasion of anothers betrayal, if we try not to look into the merits or demerits of the individual case, but try to understand the idea that there is no evil, wrong, error, mistake, or falsehood in the world except what we SEE from inside our ego, Mother changes everything right. News comes to us contrary to our previous convictions. The power lies in our accepting the Mother, our willingness to look into our own contribution to the problem. The rule that without a corresponding act on our part no one can do us wrong is an ultimate LAW. Understanding it dissolves our part. With it, the part of the other too DISSOLVES.

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